What should I expect when I first load up the game? More importantly how do you spawn ?
If I never played W:ET . . . .
You should expect to be lost. You won’t understand anything. You’ll die from shots that came out of nowhere. You will wander aimlessly going on the opposite dorection of everybody else. You will be frustrated and curse the game, and you won’t be able to distinguish friend from foe.
Just like every other game.
Have a spare pair of knickers on hand first of all. Expect greatness. You spawn by first selecting the class you want to be and you may wish to change your spawn by clicking on it on the command map (generally best to leave it though) on the limbo menu, pick your side, click ok. Then bathe in the greatness and shortly after you’ll realise why I recommended the spare cecks.
First time will be a bit overwhelming, just stay relaxed and learn at your own pace.
To spawn, press “L” by default. From there, select a team, then a class.
Until you learn the classes/weapons, it’s best to play medic. A medic can heal (press 6 for health packs) and revive (press 5 for needle) his teammates, and is always a welcome sight. While you’re new, tag along with an engineer to learn the objectives, as they will tend to be doing them and will always be happy to have a medic along.
Another good option would be engineer with SMG (save the rifle grenades for a skilled player until you learn them, as they may be limited depending on the server). At least you can look for things to build/destroy/defuse.
Field Ops are also welcome for their ability to hand out ammo, but you run the risk of killing teammates with artillery/airstrikes, so be very careful until you are familiar with those very powerful weapons. Same goes for the panzerfaust as soldier - a panzer who has patience and waits for multi-kills is admired, one who kills himself along with one enemy and a teammate is universally hated.
Finally, never play as a soldier with an SMG. Some people will say it’s a good learning class, but you can learn the basics of shooting as another class, while also having other useful abilites. SMG soldiers might as well have “noob” tattooed on their foreheads.
Good luck and have fun!
come back to tell us how it was going!
ouroboro’s hints were good - don’t take a player class/weapon with too much or heavy controllable firepower like flame thrower, panzerfaust, airstrike, artillery, rifle grenades, maybe even mg42
on our et servers it always was a good way to get yourself kicked, using a heavy weapon and killing teammates with it - same for many other servers. it may not look like it at the start but the bigger the weapon the harder it is to master it! (that includes especially the panzerfaust)
try to help your teammates with whatever packs you have and don’t go rambo - and you should be fine
When in the limbo menu, you will notice that certain classes have more than one weapon to use. You need to click their weapon icon in limbo, and a list of choices will appear. Medics only have one weapon, FWIW.
Maybe have a peek at these two websites…
http://4newbies.planetwolfenstein.gamespy.com/enemyterritory.htm
and
http://www.et-strategy.uni.cc/
Which have lots of info for new and even some tricks and stuff for other players…
also, after patching to 2.60 remember to download ETPro and add
+set fs_game etpro
after the brackets, in the path of your ET launcher link
then try to find servers that run ETpro and that don’t have too many custom maps (you’ll want to download those by yourself), and then just play! 
Patch to 2.60, but do not install 2.60b if you want to play on etpro servers. Last time I tried( which was several weeks ago
), etpro servers + punkbuster didn’t really like patched clients.
before you play online, run the game and go to “host game” (leave the ‘dedicated server’ option to ‘no’). no real need to set any other options i think, just select a map.
now you can have a run around to get an idea with what it’s about.
to switch to other maps press Escape and call a vote to one of the other maps.
Stay away from multiple kill weapons like panzers and rifle grenades, as you will more than likely kill your team mates and they wont like you for it.
If you try mortaring, prepare to mortar thyself, everyone does it…
Instead of what DG said you could try an empty server as well.
And what I usual do to learn a game, push every button and see what it does :). It’s nice to know how to change class (limbo menu, under “L”), chat (T), voicechat (V), and reaload in combat ®.
There is a handy manual under W:ET->W:ET Help->Manual in your start menu that will tell you most things you need to know.
My biggest advice for a new player is to follow other players after you spawn so you get an idea where the action is (and they get shot at first too).
I’m also trying to “learn” W:ET at the moment, thx for these tips guys, they have proven helpful so far ;D
You should expect to be lost. You won’t understand anything. You’ll die from shots that came out of nowhere. You will wander aimlessly going on the opposite dorection of everybody else. You will be frustrated and curse the game, and you won’t be able to distinguish friend from foe.
Yeah that’s pretty accurate… lol 
It seems quite a bit harder to learn than most games… i can do the shooty shooty bit (been playing fps games for ages), its just the “what to do” bit that takes some getting used to. Running around the maps on my own server and completing all objectives just to see how it worked helped though.
One thing which im not too sure i like yet, is that it takes quite a lot of hits to kill people… even multiple headshots O.o
That’s actually one of the best ET features, as it tends to speed up the game and intensifies the action immensly. Why? Simply, because people dont have to be that carful any more, running around a corner into an anmbush? You might be able to escape if you are quick enough, no more instant death without even knowing from where you’ve been shot!
Deadly games tend to create camper who sit somwhere, waiting for unsuspecting enemys to get some easy kills. Camper tend to slow the game down as everybody moves more carefully and slower for the fear of dying so fast (and there is nothing more boring than waiting for the respawn
)
FWIW, a good starter class is the support medic who sticks close to an engineer. Why? Engineers are usually the ones who have to do the objective (fix something, blow shit up, construct something) and therefore make good people to follow around. In a lot of servers, they don’t always get stellar back up, so a good medic to heal them, revive them, and provide covering fire is always welcome.