Kooky Balance Changes - PART TWO/4.75!? [SATIRE]

(hawkeyeguy99) #101

Make the Katana a lightsaber that actually dismembers people.

(AlbinMatt) #102

@Eox Thanks!

@hawkeyeguy99 And make Arty Han Solo.

(Xenithos) #103

@Eox Thanks for merging them, I had a separate post open for days, However, there’s an Issue, The post I started with on the other one, it had two other people, and that post is gone.

Edit: False flag… you edited the old one into this one, which is dandy, The original post I made is still post number one, which means everything is disorienting…

(Xenithos) #104

If anyone wants to see Fletcher or Fragger, that’s the current First Post on this one… :confused:

(Xenithos) #105

DANG IT. WHY DIDNT I THINK OF THAT!? MORE LASERS PEW PEW.

(Xenithos) #106

Sawbonez: “ufknwotm8?”

[/quote]

Sigh, you have no idea the amount of root beer I drink when making these. Almost as addicting and brain changing as Smurfberries. Smh.

(Xenithos) #107

I’m just making realism jokes. Read it as “His Grenade would be more fatal if he were to use a grenade that’s actually more modern.” They called the MKII grenade a “Pineapple” and it’s from WW2. SD’s art makes it clear he’s not throwing the original Pineapple, but I still wanted to make a joke about him claiming people should Eat Pineapple. I think Balance wise Fragger and Skyhammer are about as perfect as you can get. Maybe his Machine gun could use some tweaking, but that aside. shrugs

Edit: I’m also throwing some of my own childhood games and memories into these posts. For instance, the SDF’s reflex cannon is from Robotech, and EDF 2017 is an obscure xbox 360 game about killing crappy looking ants and robots from space. And it’s known for it’s crazy amount of weapons.
[spoiler]I can’t find a clip of it. But the weapons were horrible sometimes, as in they intentionally put garbage prototype weapons into the game for you to have fun with. One of the grenades called the m2000 or something intentionally could only be thrown so far even at max distance, and it did 5000 damage in a huge nuke worthy radius. Which in that game means it would kill you almost no matter what every time you threw it because it would drop on top of your head. Oh, not to mention EVERY single building in that game fell immediately and shattered and junk whenever hit by any explosive type weapon. I can just imagine Fragger throwing a grenade of doom into a wall and it exploding, causing the engineers to lose their jobs.[/spoiler]

(TheStrangerous) #108

Mickey Mouse would like to have a word with you… While pulling his huuuuuge DMCA sledgehammer under his pants.

(Xenithos) #109

Mickey Mouse would like to have a word with you… While pulling his huuuuuge DMCA sledgehammer under his pants.[/quote]

PLEASE MICKEY NO!

(Your worst knifemare.) #110

Aimee should be able to tape her snitch onto turrets. That way the turret sees someone and they become swiss cheese.

(AlbinMatt) #111

There’s little to no merc synergy in DB
Best you’ll get is Rhino laying his fat arse on Aura. We need more synergies!

@Lord_Coctus had a good idea, allow Aimee to attach her SNITCH to Kushbanker’s turret. A French fashion stylist and surveillance expert alongside a manly Texan engineering teacher and an aimbot turret as their pet. What a lovely family!

Kira can now summon the beam of light as a beacon of death AND of delight. If she strikes her laser onto Phoenix, he will momentarily merge with the laser itself, pulsing and extending the lasers reach by twenty metres, and the pulse will also heal teammates in addition to cooking enemies. A PhD in engineering, and an overall meme machine married to a Spanish revolutionist in medicine
What’s not to love?

(TheStrangerous) #112

If we speak of synergy, then let Stoker ignite RedEye’s smoke!

(TitaniumRapture) #113

@Xenithos said:
144hz Acer GN246HL.

I grew up on the old CRTs and sometimes I still think pictures came out better in those and plasma after they heated up than this bad boy. Probably just me mis-remembering the “good old days.” I know what I’ve got is better, but meh.

I feel you man. Only good thing about LCDs is size and maybe power consumption. I have been using LCD only for only 3 years or so. I miss you DELL CRT. :confused:

(Chilled Sanity) #114

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(TitaniumRapture) #115

@LoafOfBread said:
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DONT PLAY WITH ME MAN!1!

(Chilled Sanity) #116

@TitaniumRapture said:

@LoafOfBread said:
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DONT PLAY WITH ME MAN!1!

Proxy.
Is.
Deleted.

(TheStrangerous) #117

Phantom gets machete instead of katana.
Katana gets retconned, making so that Kira was the OG Katana master all this time.

(AlbinMatt) #118

@Xenithos Part 3 plox?

(Your worst knifemare.) #119

Every time Thunder dies he truly bangs them all.

(Xenithos) #120

@Xenithos
You died bruh.
Xenception.

Edit: Will have another 4-6 done sometime today, my apologies everyone. My Steam hours per 2-week period hit 6…