[Story-time] It costs an arm and a leg


(bontsa) #1

The flickering ceiling lamp swayed a little as the heavy tank-like Extraction Vehicle, EV they tended to call it, rolled through the road outside the building, shaking the beaten construction slightly while passing. Well, clinging might be more fitting judging from the shape of the worn off cord it hung on in order to fight against the relentless force of gravity. The abandoned ground-floor dental clinic, in which the two men that had gathered in, had seen better days. With the exception of the heavy dentist’s chair, everything that had been loose was long gone. Even if it looked like looters must’ve ditched the seat solely because it was too large to fit in pockets, scratch marks around the bolts attaching the furniture to the floor indicated it hadn’t been left there without trying.

Instead of copper-plated anti-bacterial shelves that were usually seen around these clinics, a few ammunition crates and sturdy wooden boxes, containing medical equipment, filled one of the sides split by the room dividing wall. The other part was dedicated for a make-shift gun maintenance point. Two unopened boxes served as a table for this setup. Welding equipment was leaning to a wall right next to back door, that back in the day was most probably used by clinic employees to sneak out for cig breaks. It gave access to a narrow alley behind the building. The room divider seemed to have fallen victim to someone’s aching renovation itch, as it had a torso-sized hole smashed through it about a meter above the ground. From the partially blocked window that was facing the road in front, the EV could be seen turn around the building’s corner with a handful of mercenaries escorting it.

“… but you should be a bit less footloose in the caretaking of this mechanical wonderr, or you’ll find yourrself a bit… footless. Like a Flamenco Flamingo.”
“For the last time Turtle, I’m damn sure striking puns is not required for this leg maintenance.” said the man of rather obviously hispanic origins, with his tanned skin and strong, slightly singing accent.
“Hey, Phoenix, why such an ass? A little humourr won’t hurrt, isn’t laughter the best medicine or something? Besides, I wouldn’t talk like that to the perrson who is tasked in…”
¡Vete al carajo! Stop it!”
handling your extrremities." pierced fellow replied with an ear-to-ear wide grin on his bearded face. Almost underlining R’s in any word his mouth produced gave his Türkish origins away pretty clearly. Despite the chatter, he worked without losing his focus for a single second from Phoenix’s artificial limb. Both the meat and metal hands Turtle possessed worked delicately but rapidly, replacing battered hydraulic tubes and other faulty structures as they went by part after part.

At first, the Spaniard was clearly trying to come back with something, but after a short silence and clenched fist, a surrendering sigh escaped his lips as he turned his head towards the hole in the room divider, giving sightline to the blocked window on the other side of the room, as if he could’ve seen anything much through the small peek holes drilled to its wall-side edges.

The next ten minutes passed in the silent humming of a nearby electrical transducer, that was occasionally speared by distant gunfire and explosions when rest of the band of mercenaries were carrying out their mission. Who knows why that one skyscraper specifically needed EMP charges to be brought down or why it had to be brought down in the first place. There was money to be made and this mission sure paid well.

Turtle got up from the small crate he was using as a chair, wiping his hands clean of oil with a rough microfibre towel. The limb looked as good as new and the bends caused by bullets were gone thanks to memory metal and acceleration of this “healing” process. The damage from fried electronics was fixed now and the leg could once again bear weight and rough situations the battlefield outside threw at them. He grabbed his fine tuning tools lying on the operating chair, while Phoenix started getting up.

“AaalleyHUP! It’s done”
“Finally, it was getting boring. Vamos, we should be going already!” Phoenix
“But it is worrth a while to get such a piece of arrt properly alive and kicking, don’thca think Mr. Medic?”
“Turtle I swear one day I’m going to…”
“Give me the boot?” the engineer snickered while organizing his tools in his camouflaged, sturdy toolbox.
“One more Mr. Mechanic and we will see the end of this mano a mano!” Phoenix said, backing up his statement with a boxer stance and a few sharp swings.
Turtle stopped in his tracks and turned calmly towards the irritated ex-surgeon:
“You surre could have done it yourrself then, eh?”
Phoenix lowered his hands, grabbed his helmet and put it on. With his blazing red hair included, this simple action resembled putting down a fire with a sky blue blanket.
“…gracias” he mumbled.
“That’s better”

The medic glanced again to the covered window and came to a halt. It was eerily quiet.
“Where’s the humming?” he turned to his companion briefly, then back to window.
“Hmm? What?”
“The electrical box. It stopped?”
“Oh those things tend to fall aparrt all the time when we only upkeep ones nearby our strrategic locations, besides our colleagues arre on their way to plant an EMP remember?.”
By the time Phoenix continued voicing his doubts, he had already gotten to the window and proceeded to peek through one of the holes in the wooden planks nailed on it.
Sí, sí and that’s not even the one delivering power to this building, but we should be plenty away from the EMP for that to affect our positi…”

Just before an ear shattering sound of heavy, probably .50 caliber, gunshot reached them, the blockade simply blew into splinters from the side where he had stood on. As Phoenix fell to the floor, every millisecond made him increasingly aware of the bullet wound in his left chest alongside with sharp slivers that cut deep into the skin of his uncovered arm. The suffocating echo of the shot was accompanied with his sharp, surprised howl. By the time the medic’s fall was complete, Turtle had already grabbed his submachine gun resting on first box within arms reach and was crouching and leaning against the room divider. Getting lower was necessary, as a second projectile penetrated the blockade, rather what was left of it, flew through the hole and smashed into the door in the back with quite a force now that bullets path was less obstructed.


(bontsa) #2

“Alive. It’s…urgh…quite deep, think it messed up a good chunk of my shoulder, I…urf… just buy me time so…”
The Türk already had a small hand mirror, using it to glimpse the condition the Spaniard was in from the inner doorway. There was no knowing what angle the shooter had so he didn’t want to peek. While most probably the bullet hole in front was indeed small, what the high velocity projectile had done while exiting his body…He watched the bullet, covered in blood and still some messy tissue attached to it, roll next to the room divider. Well, at least it had exited, so that’s something.
“Fuck rrighto, stay conscious, I’ll come and lift your sorry arrse…”
With the echo of the previous shots were still lingering, the rest of their communication was punctuated by several more gunshots, each piercing the alley door.


The humming was back. Almost inaudible, but it kept irritating the faint figure approaching the building.
“Goddamnit this piece of crap needs some maintenance, how can I be a cool’n’invisible assassin guy if a fucking hum gives my position away? Least EMP field takes care of electric lighting, meh.” Phantom thought to himself, while keeping an eye on the console on his armours hand plate indicating the charge of the cloak, and another eye on the window no longer covered by wooden fortifications.
“Although I wish I had this in high school. Like, and her dad shows up? Poof! Hah, sucker…”
He coughed faintly to get his mind back on track. Silent step after another, the distance between him and the window growing shorter.
“And back to finish the work. Medical equipment repossession, huh? From blue coated Spanish fella wearing a helmet and a modern pegleg, as long as nanite-controlling device is intact target’s status doesn’t matter. Karma Chame~eleon here I go…”


The only light present in the clinic was an eerie shimmer provided by glowsticks. Turtle had cracked a couple of them active when lighting in the room had suddenly given up. With the aid of the darkness he had crawled to lean against the outer wall with the now open window. Hearing a single, faint splash outside he immediately regretted that decision, as that heavy sound did not come from a lone piece of paper or other object the weak evening wind might’ve had thrown into a puddle; it was a footstep. Sharpening his senses he grabbed his handgun tighter and prepared for opposition from either the window or the door.

”This was all in vain too if Phoenix drropped dead” he thought. The medic had answered him a short while ago but had silenced right when lights had gone dark. Unconscious or lifeless, he had no way of telling yet and a more pressing concern was requiring his attention for now. With eyes still fixated on the window, as he counted on hearing the door to open in case that would be the entry route of the enemy, the muzzle flash that seemed to emerge from nothingness left him completely surprised. A bullet pierced the one of his shoulders that was still fully organic. He let a loud groan while he simultaneously raised his gun with the mechanical arm, only to have another gunshot knocked it out of his hand, damaging the artificial limb in the process. Checkmate.

“Well well you could cut the tension here with a knife huh?” Turtle heard a cheery American hoot come out of nowhere. Since when had window frames start to talk with English affected by freedom, entrepreneur- friendly business laws and burgers?
“No more tricks pal, and you don’t need to get a new torso built too okay?” it continued.
"Firrst time I’ve taken orderrs from a spectrre…” Turtle started looking around trying to locate the speaker, attempting to raise both of his arms from the elbow up while right one, mechanical, was pressing his left shoulder. Blood dripped from between his broken, metallic fingers.

A masked man appeared with a sharp…sound? No, it was more like sharp lack-of-a-sound, Turtle thought as he now realised some kind of constant, suffocating humming was gone when his opposition became visible. As he climbed in from the window, Turtle saw him rocking a full body armour, accompanying his revolver with a long sword hanging on his back.
"Quit your yapping and crawl more middle of the wall so I can see both your arms and be sure you ain’t hiding something behind there. " he said, backing up the statement with a careless wave of his free hand, keeping the revolver pointed at Phoenix’s immobile body.
“Fine calm it, I’m no thrreat, I’m…semi-armless herre anyway” Turtle tapped his knuckles once on the metallic arm like to solidify his pun as he executed the order.
“…Good one. My target’s the Señor Gringo over here though, so I have no interest in you as long as you keep it cool o’right?” he said kicking the lying body in it’s limp leg while still keeping his eyes on the Türk.
“All yourrs, the fucker tried to make a run for it without paying for his leg worrk anyway” he spat the words in the general direction of the Spaniard.
For a brief moment the American turned his gun pointing at Turtle “Ok ok hold on there comedian and enjoy the show. Hands inside the vehicle until the end of the ride and all tha…”

And a brief moment was more than enough. The room that already had experienced enough gunfire sounds to host a small turf war, was once again filled with shots. In the same blink of an eye the ghostly mercenary’s armour withstood the first hit from Phoenix’s pistol, the oppressive humming started the instant their foe turned invisible. Second landed and stopped into what looked like mid-air, alongside with sparks and cracks. A silhouette of the attacker was revealed for a brief moment, facing the window in a running motion. The third bullet found its way to flesh and as an agonised grunt was heard and small beads of blood fell on the floor, some splinters on window moved around and fell on the floor announcing the escape of their phantom-like visitor. The medic quickly stood up at the window in order to keep shooting.


(bontsa) #3

”NO, DUCK!” Turtle yelled quickly, resulting in Phoenix crouching just in time for single, warning-like rifle bullet flying in from the opening.
Gringo is MEXICAN Spanish, matón…” he mumbled as if the escaping man could still hear. After getting that off his chest, he turned towards Turtle with a slightly questioning expression on his face.

”Ourr little phantom menace was packing a big peashooterr, but not big enough to shoot that,” he stated, pointing to the now scarlet tinted bullet by the room divider.
”Didn’t look much like a ranger eitherr, liked getting up close and perrsonal so I figurred he had someone on overrwatch” the engineer explained the gunshots echo had changed into a hissing sound and some grenade-induced smokescreen started creeping in from the window.
”It’s getting a bit drrafty in here, carre to close the window?” he continued, sliding his portable tactical cover towards Phoenix and added with a honest impression in his voice:
“Rremind me later, I want to thorroughly examine your nanite tech. Still not rreally surre though if it’s those only making you live up to the codename."
”I keep you alive… I keep ME alive! What’s not to love?" the medic shrugged with no struggle whatsoever, despite one third of his clothings backside being still a grim reminder of the shot that had pierced him just a handful of minutes ago. He picked up the shield, placing it promptly to the opening and clicking it open so it wedged itself to fill the gap. Surprising neither of them, one bullet hit the shield almost immediately, but as the shield did not give up nor fall, the next two projectiles that flew into it had almost a bored, lazy tone in the tings they made against the hardened steel blocking their route to the back door.

”They express their inadequacy with gunfire,” Phoenix said almost cheerily, ”how about we have a quick look at that wound and relocate” he continued while fiddling with his nanite controller.

A short silence made him raise his eyes off the device for a moment to see why the reply took longer than anticipated. Seeing the Türks slightly rugged face sporting the largest possible smirk that could fit it, he immediately regretted asking such a rhetorical question.
”I could use a hand indeed.”
Por el amor de Dios…” Phoenix audibly gave up, and a dim blue glow emerged from his hands as he approached his comrade.


(bontsa) #4

Well, I’m just extremely relieved thats finally out there. Not like I had started it right after ReV event or anything :*

The knowledge of the 3 languages I possess cannot properly express the gratitude I feel towards @MisterBadmin for helping out a great ton, proofreading, giving ideas and checking for stuff! Huge thanks to @Kirays and MischievousMac for support and criticism (or just being awesome!)


(MisterBadmin) #5

<3

I take full responsibility for about a third of the puns.


(bontsa) #6

With great puns comes great responsibility I say!

Ohmy I just realized I need to come up with new wordplays for my signature would I be to make more stories.


#7

Wow! Absolutely amazing.
You are an incredible story writer.
Please never stop.

By the way, I shall not forget MisterBadmin who helped you.
Many kudos to you as well.

Great work you two! :slight_smile:


(Your worst knifemare.) #8

Good job.