Laws of Balance

#21

Press K to thank them.

(LifeupOmega) #22

Press K to thank them. [/quote]

I always K out if its not a medic honestly, I’d rather be back in 5 seconds with full ammo and health, and the guy wasting time helping me can do something else - like, I don’t know, not losing the game by ignoring the cap and helping people up.

(ostmustis) #23

you press k just before they finish so they never try to revive again because the f**** just release anyway

(DankBeretField) #24

So… many… knowledge… (Canary is fainted)
But seriously, good point. Mind if I copy it and put it into the New Players section, please? For THE END OF THE VASELINE EMPIRE!

EDIT: Like to add a few things too:

  1. If you are willing to spend your first 30k creds for Vasilli, uninstall the game.
  2. You CAN revive someone. Even when you aren’t a medic. It WILL turn the tide of a battle.
  3. Don’t trust your team’s medic. They might be a noob, or hired by the enemy to fail your team. Unless they are the class-@Shinywindow Aura.
  4. Of ALL of 10 Shuffle Vote, 0.000000000000000000000000000000000001 Vote will rebalance the match.
  5. Enjoy the game. If you don’t, play Overwatch instead.
(Szakalot) #25
  • if you see a kira laser travel randomly on the map, the laser will inexplicably go straight for you and kill you without the kira even noticing you were there
  • if a skyhammer wants to give you ammo, they will throw a pack, pick it up themselves and forget about the whole thing
  • if you die when moving as a group of teammates, any medics in the group will ignore you, but heal and revive expertly everyone else, right before your very eyes
  • the ev always gets disabled 1cm before reaching the final destination
(Your worst knifemare.) #26

Press K to thank them. [/quote]

I always K out if its not a medic honestly, I’d rather be back in 5 seconds with full ammo and health, and the guy wasting time helping me can do something else - like, I don’t know, not losing the game by ignoring the cap and helping people up.[/quote]

Well i was talking about while theres still 20 seconds on the time.

(Chilled Sanity) #27

[quote=“BlackboltLW;215224”]I think I’ve done one edited Murphy’s Law for DB

Found it



http://i.imgur.com/tA52HI3.png[/quote]

5 is my favorite

(BlackboltLW) #28

@canaryField Yeah, sure. I stole the actual image from my facebook timeline anyway before editing it :’’)))

(bontsa) #29

I always K out if its not a medic honestly, I’d rather be back in 5 seconds with full ammo and health, and the guy wasting time helping me can do something else - like, I don’t know, not losing the game by ignoring the cap and helping people up.[/quote]

Well i was talking about while theres still 20 seconds on the time.[/quote]

Well the next rule is actually:

If a teammate tries to help you up, its always with 4 seconds left on a timer and you will both die in the process getting longspawned :wink:

Bonus probability of this happening when you’re not a medic. And even more bonus points the help-upper is ignoring the medic that is also downed right next to you.

(Teflon Love) #30

Players complaining about balance the loudest neither play medic nor engineer.

(Your worst knifemare.) #31

If Kira is in a match, you can always expect kawaii

(RyePanda) #32

Every mine has an equal and opposite reaction of saltiness.

(DankBeretField) #33
  1. For every joy a ammo bag delivered, there is an equal and opposite reaction from an useless Vaseline wanting to abuse you to waste ammo for no reason whatsoever
  2. Explosive Saltiness = Mine * Cancerous Proxy ^ 2
(Cletus_VanDamme) #34

If you’re happy to stomp a team 7 vs 4, you don’t have the right to complain about ‘balance’ when the team numbers even up.

(GatoCommodore) #35

If you happen to stomp the enemy, become bottom Scoreboarder and when the game is over type “GG ez” for maximum salt

(AlphaUT) #36

When you see your bottom score teammate got carried by you, and he typed “ez” in the end, do not hesitate to type, “STFU you got carried, moron” and ready to be the enemy of his next match if he stays.

(Your worst knifemare.) #37

If an enemy does notfinish you as pheonix, feel free to self revive and shove your knife up their anus

(watsyurdeal) #38

The one guy on the team who is actually playing correctly, is the carry. The rest are fodder

(pumpkinmeerkat) #39

Every match is “GG EZ” for the bottom of the scoreboard on the winning team.

(DirtyDav) #40

If everyone on the other team has 200+ ping, you’re in for a crappy great match.
If everyone on the other team plays as proxies/auras and bunnyhop with shotties, you’re in for a crappy great match.
If everyone on the other team plays sniper, you’re in for a crappy great match.
If everyone on the other team plays fletcher with stickies as their primary weapon, you’re in for a crappy great match.
If everyone on the other team plays thunder, you’re in for a crappy great match.

If everyone on the other team has 200+ ping and is playing bunnyhopping shotty proxy/aura, a sniper, a fletcher with stickies as primaries, or a thunder, you’re in for JESUS FUCK WTF IS LIFE FUCK THIS FUCKING STUPID GAME FUCK YOU PIECE OF SHIT UNTRACKABLE MOTHERFCKERS FML FUCK YOU ALL CNTFGGYMOTHERF**ERS a great time!

edit: censored for all the innocent people who haven’t had the pleasure of these kinds of matches before…