I’m bored as hell, so let’s do this, why not?
-Proxy: On the first day of Christmas Dirty Bomb gave to me,
This broken sh**ty EV
[EV disabled, repair it!]
-Fragger: On the second day of Christmas DB gave to me,
2 triggered mines!
Proxy: And the broken f**king EV!
[Sound of incoming airstrike]
-Sawbonez: On the third day of Christmas DB gave to me,
3 missed medpack! [Skyhammer magically dogded all of Sawbonez medpack
Fragger: 2 triggered mines!
Proxy: [high pitched scream, signifying that an airstrike has bombed the EV]
[EV disabled!]
-Arty: On the fourth day of Christmas DB gave to me,
4 bunnyhoppers!
Sawbonez: 3 f**king medpack wasted!
Fragger: 2 TRIGGERED MINES! (AGAIN!)
Proxy: REPAIRING THE E-- (killed by a random grenade)
-Aura: On the fifth day of Christmas DB gave to me,
5. Bullets. Left!
Arty: 4 Jumping Jacks!
Sawbonez: 3 missed medpacks!
Fragger: Damn those goddamn mines!
Proxy: And that damn stupid sh**ty EV!
-Skyhammer: On the 6th day of Christmas DB gave to me,
6 useless snipers!
Aura: 5. Bullet. Left! I need ammo!
Arty: 4 flying fairies!
Sawbonez: Pick up that 3 medpack!
Fragger: I HATE YOU PROXY!
Proxy: Shut up! I trying to-- [Died by Kira’s Pillar of Fire]
-Bushwhacker: On the 7th day of Xmas DB gave to me, 7 chickened teammates!
Sky: 6 Vaseline a**holes!
Aura: 5. Bullets. Left! Ammo!
Arty: [ranting in 4 forums]
Saw: Well, I don’t need that three-- [shot by Nader, who heales by Saw’s trashed medpacks]
Fragger: Triggered 2 mines!
Proxy: I hate this goddamn EV so much!
-Redeye: On the 8th day of Xmas DB gave to me, 8 Eggs of Death!
Bush: 7 coward teammates!
Sky: Damn those goddamn snipers!
Aura: [Sitting duck on an ammo cache, while 5 sounds of clicking can be heard]
Arty: Still 4 bunny hoppers
Saw: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
Frag: Another 2 mines!
Prox: And that fkin’ fking EV
Fletcher: On the 9th day of Christmas DB gave to me,
9 enemy turret!
Red: 8 grenades incoming!
Bush: Get back you cowards!
Vasilli: [missed his shot] OMG HACKER!
Aura: 5-- [Shotgun sound, followed by a knife slash. Aura is dead]
Art: Ranting on FOUR-rums.
Saw: [still raging]
Frag: [blown and killed by Proxy]
Prox: Yeah-- [EV disabled] I HATE YOU EV!
Jackal Commander: On the 10th day of Christmas DB gave to me,
10 failed attacks!
Flet: 9 Bush turrets!
Red: [girl-ish scream, followed by 8 grenades]
Bush: 7 useless a**hole!
Sky: 6 goddamn snipers!
Aura: [hit the 25-seconds respawn time]
Art: Somebody kill the bunnyhoppers!
Saw: 3 wasted medpacks! (Again)
Frag: [accidentally downed himself by shooting 2 mines]
Prox: And that bulls**t goddamn-- [sniped]
Aimee: On the 11th day of Christmas DB gave to– WHAT?
11 SNITCH destroyed?
Jackal Com: 10 failed offense!
Flet: 9 Whack’s turrets!
Red: 8 flying nades!
Bush: 7 human-chickens!
Sky: Play the objectives, damn it! (Vasilli responds: Isn’t this Team Deathmatch?)
Aura: [15 seconds to respawn]
Art: 4 bouncing balls!
Saw: 3 lying medpacks!
Frag: Hey, that route doesn’t has any mines! [exploded by the just-activated mines under his feet]
Prox: WHY DOES THE EV KEEPS DISABLING?!
Everyone: On the 12th day of Chirstmas that DB ruined for me:
12 months of bugs
11 months of boredom
10 months of fkery
9 months of hackers
8 months of unbalance
7 months of troll
6 months of Vaselines
5 months for a new mercs!
4 months of crazies
3 months of aholes
2 months of ragequit
And that broken sh**ty EV!
NOTE: Although this carol seems to sound like someone that hates Dirty Bomb, I don’t hold any grudge or hatred agaisnt DB and Splash Damage. The cuss words were there is to increase the anger of the character in the carol.